BBW Blog: Big Butt Nicole’s BBW Porn Blog

Welcome to my BBW Lair. Yea I am so biting off of Tori’s Lair but I don’t mean my website, hehe I mean my actual home. With every photo and video update I invite you to catch a glimpse of my private life and see how I live. Anyway this afternoon I was watching an interview with an author and she said something very interesting that definitely perked my ears right up lol. She said that the state in which a woman keeps her home is a direct reflection of the state of her life. LOL Soo… going by that picture I think it’s safe to say that I’ve got my mind on my money and my money on my mind lol. OMG LOL how cheesy but yea. I agree with the statement. My place does get a little out of sorts throughout the day as I use stuff and cook but you can be sure that order is brought to the chaos by the end of the day. Hell what am I talking about? LOL I just wanted to show you how I put my old money boa to good use instead of storing it in the closet for the rest of eternity lol.

Cash Rules Everything Around Me

There is a logical reason for me posting this I swear lol. I wanted to ease you into some new pictures I shot of myself the other day. It was just a relaxed, breezy day and I had the back door in the bedroom open and I was feeling adventurous, somewhat. LOL I live behind the police station so I can’t be too adventurous lol otherwise I will end up in the pokey. This is my version of gritty amateurish photography lol, only with a good camera. Note to self… never take pics of yourself when you are backlit by natural light. I swear one day I will get this whole lighting then licked, that is a promise lol. Anyway I did like how it lent a very amateurish feel without it being.

Big fat ass in dem damn jeans again!

Oh look, it’s Big Butt Nicole and she’s waiting for a big strapping man to come to her door and give her a good hard fucking lol. So everything must be working according to plan because everything in my life is improving for me. I can’t wait to one day post pictures of me in my new place but that might be a little while until that happens. Until then I know for certain that you will enjoy what I do share with you. Thanks for dropping in on the life of this cute BBW right here!

Mmm all lush hips, curves, and a whole lot more!

New callers 3 minutes FREE PHONE SEX!

Ok some people might read that and say that a bbw is a healthy fat girl? Isn’t that an oxymoron? LOL hear me out. As I explained back in I think April sometime, I consciously made a change to start getting away from doing the food/eating type of photos because I am changing my mindset about the health of my body. I posted my final and last set of pictures that I took of me eating from when I shot them in the fall of 2007. They were sitting there and not being utilized so of course I am going to make what ever I can off of them. I do hope those of you who enjoy seeing a pretty fat girl like me eat will buy them up because it may be a very long time before I do any like this again.

I just got back from the gym around 8:00pm tonight. I went later than I normally do, usually I go before noon so I can get back to do what work has to get done. But today I woke up late and just had to take care of other things going on today. How I eat has changed. How I view and respect my body has changed. I am thoughtful of what it is I am putting into it these days and making sure that it feels good with a lot of exercise because that is making me feel very good. Most people know that exercise is fabulous for maintaining positive energy and blowing off steam. The amount of energy I have when I walk out of the gym is incredible. That is a feeling I have not felt in about 10 years. It makes me feel accomplished, that I can achieve my goals, and in complete self-control. When I was feeling hurt, unworthy of love, and out of control, my weight skyrocketed up to the most I have ever been, 330lbs.

So I just want to say this because I know there are a lot of my fans who really do enjoy my eating photos and videos very much. I appreciate each and every one of you guys who has indulged yourselves in those little tidbits. I just feel that I would much rather project a more healthy and happy Nicole because I think that is the way you all hope me to be and prefer to see me, happy! Much love fellas , muah!

New callers 3 minutes FREE PHONE SEX!

The most important love relationship we can ever have is with ourselves. As a BBW this can be a very tough lesson to learn. In fact for any person of size this can be a hard sell. Two days ago I was hurting because I was stunned to find out something regarding someone I care for more than my words can express. We each go through our own personal pain. People damage us. We in turn damage others, unintentionally. The road to loving ourselves can be a long one for those of us who have been damaged repeatedly. I started my journey March 2007, and I have finally started to make progress this year after ending very toxic friendships. This does not mean that I am an expert and that I don’t have days when I stumble and catch myself falling into old habits and responses.

When you start to love yourself then you can gradually start to let go of fears. I discovered today that I was still holding on to some of my fears and it nearly lost me everything. When you find that person that makes you want to be a better person that is a profound feeling and something that should not be ignored. Yet this sometimes cannot prevent you from making mistakes and succumbing to those fears I mentioned earlier. I am a faulted human, I’ve made lots of mistakes and I have been very mean to many people. I have worked very hard to distance myself from who I was and there is a wide gap there now. Today was incredibly enlightening for me in regards to my personal relationship. I cherish it and him tremendously and I honestly hope that people will not be selfish and disrespectful of what I share with this person and just go away. I seriously hope that those people will do the right thing and work on loving themselves and their own partners instead of breaking apart something true and real. I sincerely hope that these people bow out now while it’s still in their best interests to do so. If they do not, they will not like the outcome. It’s time for them to be shown the door…

New callers 3 minutes FREE PHONE SEX!

Tonight I’m going to get a little bit on BBW and BHM their self worth for a moment. This is a personal subject for me and I strive very hard to keep away from very personal issues on my blog for quite some time now. It is no surprise to me that a lot of women in general have low self esteem and insecurities, so therefore it’s of no surprise that BBW have even more insecurities than thinner women.

1. What is it about people that they have to sleep around with as many people as possible and just not be happy with themselves?
2. Are people really valuing their self-worth and appeal to the opposite sex by how many notches are on the bedpost?
3. Why is it that women especially, knowingly sleep with men that are involved with other women?
4. Why are women so willing to stab each other in the back for the sake of getting some dick? Is it because of having deep feelings for that person?
5. Why do women measure their self worth by having sex with every tom, dick and harry? I know for me personally, the only reason I was involved with a person who had a significant other was because of being in love with that person and stupidly wishing for something to come out of it.
6. Why is it that pseudo-swingers* have no morals, consideration and respect for someone else’s feelings for a person?

I also have a couple of questions for the men and I really want some answers about this if possible.

1. When it comes to falling in love or being in love, does the woman have to evoke this instantaneous, earth-shaking, heavens opening up, euphoric event that happens immediately for you to decide that you fall head over heels for them?
2. Is telling a woman that you care for her very deeply the kiss of death? Does that mean that he’s just not in love with you and never will be?
3. Do men even know what being in love is? OR does it happen that after that first initial heated physical attraction that pulls a man in there is more substance that a man adores and falls in love with?
4. What happens if a man never experiences that?
5. What happens if a man is clueless to what they are experiencing and miss the queues that say hey… this one could be special?
6. What if a man never allows a woman to get close enough to him for him to develop any stronger feelings for her? Is it any wonder then that he doesn’t experience that feeling??
7. I have had many men who were interested in me in the past explain to me that when a man is very much into a woman that the sexual arousal is uncontrollable. Does that mean that he is only very into her sexually, or does that arousal come from him being stimulated emotionally by something else inside of him that causes him to feel that?

Finally I ask that if you are going to answer any of these questions please have consideration that I am asking questions that are personally relevant to me at this time and while you can be honest, please don’t be brutal in your responses.

*pseudo-swingers- I mean people who just label themselves as swingers and don’t really follow the standards and ethics of the swinger community. These are people who stray outside of their main relationships because of being discontent, looking for something else whatever.

New callers 3 minutes FREE PHONE SEX!

I have not posted on the bbw blog in about two days. Mainly because I have been exhausted and I don’t know why really. I have been going to bed extra early and sleeping really long hours. By the time I wake up I’m busy and haven’t had the opportunity to be on webcam or even write on here. I’m a little out of focus the last two days and have spent the better part of today regaining some focus and perspective on my business. I don’t talk about this stuff much on my blog here but I’ve been on a personal improvement journey for a while now. Part of that has been decluttering my living space. So… lol I had to do some clearing out in my pantry cause my kitchen is tight and small and things can get out of control very easily. I want a Blackberry Curve so I can tend to business while I’m on the road, and a laptop. But a curve will do for now.

Did some shopping today too. Bought another top, way cute and I got it for a great price. My wardrobe is really shaping up very nicely now. I have always been a clothes horse. However I would say in the last three years I’ve really let things slide and that doesn’t please me. Oh and I bought a new full length mirror since the joe boxer one I had for six years got trashed by a drunken neighbor. Yea baby so now I can check my own ass out lol and admire myself in all my new clothes lol. My life is just a bowl of cherries isn’t it lol? I really can’t complain about it, lol I’m just a creature of habit for the moment. In a few weeks things will change. Gotta get the car inspected, oil change, and see what exactly is going on with it that keeps making it misfire. I’m really hoping it’s just a clogged fuel injector and not something like the o2 sensor. Once that is all straightened out, I am going to make it a point to travel on the weekends and spend time with the people that I love. Time for bed for me guys. I will be refreshed in the morning and more eager to write something juicy and titillating on the bbw blog.

New callers 3 minutes FREE PHONE SEX!

Well, I’ve had to cancel my plans to go to the BBW Dance tonight in Woburn. I don’t know what is going on with my car, it could just be a clogged fuel injector or water in the tank. It keep sputtering when I get up to a certain speed and this has happened before when the gas got really low, so who knows. All I know is I’m not driving all the way over across the other side of the state and get stuck there in the middle of the night. Thanks, I’ll pass. I’m a little bummed because I was looking forward to some social interaction with the opposite sex but I guess there is a bigger reason why I’m being prevented from going. Hehe, maybe it’s so that I can make more money. So c’mon boys leave me some nice comments lol, cheer me up. This sexy bbw sure does need it.

New callers 3 minutes FREE PHONE SEX!